Is my boyfriend sexually attracted to me? 10 signs to look out for and what to do


Nature has made us attractive to one another because it’s essential for the continuation of the species. You may like someone as a person but if you don’t experience a mutual level of romantic attraction, there won’t be much hope for the connection. It’s important that both people feel this mutual level of romantic attraction. This doesn’t mean that you have to instantly feel fireworks go off when you meet a guy, but you should be open to the possibility of getting to know him better. We’ve all had experiences where someone is attracted to us, but we don’t reciprocate the feeling. This can lead to uncomfortable situations, especially if they continue to pursue us. Mutual attraction is important because it sets the stage for a successful relationship. On the other hand, most of us have had the disheartening experience of being turned down by someone we were attracted to. You might have even had the experience where you’re making all the moves but the other person isn’t reciprocating or giving you a clear sign.

That’s why it’s good to have a clear idea of what to look for when you’re trying to determine if the guy you’re interested in has the same feelings. It’s important to know whether or not he finds you attractive, because the street goes both ways!

If you feel like it’s difficult to get a handle on how a guy feels about you, it may help you to know that research has shown that men may have a harder time than women differentiating surprising signs of attraction. So, even if you know whether or not he finds you attractive, he might not be as perceptive to the subtle signs that you can’t stop thinking of him. Brain scans have shown that different parts of women’s brains activate when they are evaluating the behaviour of potential mates, which may make them naturally more intuitive.

1. He Blushes

Okay, so not every guy is an over-confident bro who’s showing off his junk like a peacock. Some guys, particularly the shy and awkward ones, may simply blush when they’re around you. Maybe he feels like you can read his thoughts, and is embarrassed at the idea. If you’re into the silent and shy type, look for less subtle signs a man is attracted to you sexually, because you might miss these hidden clues if you’re not paying attention.

2. He Makes Lots of Eye Contact

If you always catch him glancing your way. For instance, if you’re chatting in a group and he’s always looking to see your reaction, that can be a good sign. Intense eye contact can be a subtle sign that he’s into you, unless he’s doing the Jason Mantzoukas crazy eyes.

3. There’s a lot of flirting

One of the signs you turn a guy on is if you suddenly catch him being very flirtatious with you. Flirting is one of the most direct ways of building sexual chemistry and sexual tension between two people.

4. Open body language

If you know how to read people, open body language can be a strong sign of attraction: "They're not closed off, their arms aren't crossed, and they can sit back and relax."

5. He will notice other men if they are checking you out

If he really wants you, he will feel possessive over you. This is a primal instinct, so even if he might want to come off protective, he will be. Therefore, he will be wary of other men are checking you out. He will also be able to tell if other men are trying to make moves on you, and he might even point it out to see your reaction.

6. He Tries to Appear Taller

One subconscious, deeply ingrained sign that a man is attracted to you is if he tries to make himself appear bigger and taller by stiffening his shoulders and straightening his spine. When a man is attracted to a woman, he may also adopt a so-called “power pose,” by putting his hands on his hips and pushing up his chest.

7. His voice changes when he talks to you

It’s scientifically proven that the pitch and tone of your voice changes in the face of attraction. Don’t let this make you self-conscious; speech directed at someone you’re attracted to has also been found to make your voice more appealing to others.

8. He Licks His Lips

If you see him licking his lips around you, that may mean he’s feeling sexual chemistry. Or he just finished eating. According to a 2019 post from Psychology Today, when you are sexually interested in someone, your tongue can become more active and lead to more lip licking.

9. He Mirrors You

If he’s moving his body in sync with yours, that means he’s subconsciously connecting with you. If he’s copying everything you do and is wearing a striped shirt, a beret, and white gloves, he’s not your man; he’s a mime.

10. He stares at you, and not just your face

Although stealing glances at you is definitely one of the signs that the man in question is interested in you, staring at other parts of you is one of the overt signs a guy is really turned on by you. The eyes are a fundamental aspect of communicating sexual attraction between two people. So, if you catch him staring at not just your face, but your body, your curves, and focusing on other features of your body, it’s one of the signs you turn him on.


There's no fool proof way to know if someone likes you without directly asking, but there are some specific physical and behavioural signs that can help you gauge whether there's underlying interest. But don't read too much into everything your crush does since some signs may be reflections of their personality.

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